Third drawer down

You enter the kitchen, you are looking for sticky tape, you know the first drawer is cutlery – you know the 2nd is utensils and you know the 4th is tea towels/plastic bags. You are scared to look in the 3rd drawer. It’s the monster of monsters! This little ditty as immortalised by Jimeon says it all!

In my kitchen, there's a drawer at the top
It's got cutlery, knives, forks, spoons, the lot.
Second drawer down's got a big knife and an egg-whip.
Things that should go in the first drawer,
But they just don't fit
And the third drawer down, from the top,
It's just full of shit.

Ha ha! There's ton's of it!

Elastic bands and tally-ho's that don't stick.
Dried up glue, false teeth,
Something stolen from a hotel
Things that are broken, that you know you'll never fix
But you put them in the third drawer,
Cause you just ain't got the heart to throw them away.
It's the third drawer down, from the top,
And it's full of shit.

Bum bum bum bum, bum bum bum bum.
Bum bum bum bum.

Bluetac and cella-tape, that's been hit by a truck
One chop-stick, an ash-tray from Canada
Paid bills and envelopes
Things that you think'll come in handy,
But they just never do.
It's the third drawer down, from the top,
And it's full of shit.

Bum bum bum bum bum, Oh the third drawer
It's full of shit.

And the fourth drawer down
(That's the one below the third)
It's got plastic bags in it.

I first heard this performed many years ago, live on TV by Jimeon and by the end of tune – I was rolling around on the floor – I believe you can see it performed by Jimeon on youtube – here www.youtube.com/user/jimeoinofficial

Spill the beans - pull out your third drawer and list it below - Mine is ALL of the above, plus flea tablets, birthday candles, hammer, screwdrivers, and believe it or not (right down the back) the old (still working) TV remote!

Can you empty your third drawer and throw most of the stuff out? - Would love to hear your thoughts!