Saturday, May 28, 2011

The Truck, the Commodore and the Fallout #28

Post 27

On the 15th May 1998 I was involved in car V truck accident, that saw a commodore shortened by 3 foot either end. The following entries are from a diary I kept at the time.

It’s now 13 years later and the pain is still here – the TAC of course have wiped their hands of me. I learnt a long time ago that the only person you can rely on is you and it’s something that has stood me in good stead for longer than I can remember.

5th March 1999

Now the bosses’ wife is saying I shouldn’t be making any phone calls from work regarding my personal life. I don’t have a problem with that. It was the way it was said and the venom that was behind it and the way it was directed at me. I believe as long as you don’t go overboard (maybe 1-2 calls a day) that it is perfectly okay to make personal phone calls. On the condition that they last no longer than 1-2 minutes and that they are not holding up other calls or keeping people waiting.

The boss’s wife yesterday, asked me to work on the factory floor and I said no, and
She then blamed the chiro, physio and doctor for the fact that I am not ‘better.’ She
also tried to say it was my fault for seeing them. She reckons that they are only in it for the money…………..

I feel like I am chasing a spectre around my body. It is hard to explain the pain when it keeps moving and the pain can feel so different depending on where it is located. In my arm it is throbbing and stabs constantly. In my back it just sits there like a monster, waiting for me to do something it doesn’t like and then it bites. In my shin it is a strong tingle………

After almost 12 months, I can understand how people get depressed and feel worthless. I am beginning to feel the same. Everywhere I look and everything I try to do reminds me of what I can no longer do or what I should be doing and can no more. It’s a horrible feeling and no matter how positive I try and be things are starting to get on top of me and I am starting feel useless.

Even just sitting ay my desk, makes me feel like crying with the pain.

Post 29

Post 1 - The Beginning

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